There is one thing that can help you get organized now! Getting dressed first thing every day can totally change your life! Here are some reasons why…
Do you want to get out of debt? Do you want to get your house organized and have more control over your life? Do you want your family to respect you more than they do? Then get dressed!
I realize that for some people, like those with newborns and toddlers, this can be a challenge to say the least, but do what you can. At first it may mean only getting dressed during the baby’s first nap of the day, but keep working at it until you can comb your hair and put on your make-up.
Getting dressed may not seem important but it really is at the top of the list of things you can do to improve your life. I had a woman once tell me she never got dressed in the morning, but that she could do her housework just fine. This same woman in the next breath was bemoaning the fact she couldn’t get her family to help her or show her any respect. Take a good long look in the mirror at yourself and see what your family sees. Is it a woman perpetually dressed in pajamas or sweats, with hair sticking out all over and without any make-up? I know they are your family and are supposed to love you no matter how you look. They would never ever say anything to you because they do love you, but there is a difference between love and respect.
I know several women who never ever put on make-up or get dressed unless they are going to work or out someplace fancy. How do you think that makes their husbands and children feel? The message that a family receives is that they are not as important as the rest of the world. Many of these women wonder why their families don’t respect them! If your boss showed up each day to work in her pajamas, without make-up and combed hair and then proceeded to sit down at her cluttered desk before demanding that you keep your desk spotless, wear pantyhose and a skirt and keep your nails manicured, how would you feel? Would you respect her? Would you want to even introduce her to your friends? You might do what she says, but you wouldn’t respect her.
Do you think your husband and young children don’t notice how you present yourself? Do you remember as a young child seeing your mom all dressed up to go to church or out for the evening and being so proud of how beautiful she looked? If your mom never dressed up, do you remember seeing your friends moms and wishing yours looked like that? Children notice even the littlest things. One day, my 5 year old granddaughter hugged me and said “Nan, you and Great Grandma always smell so good!” Even something as small as using a little perfume makes an impression and leaves a lasting memory.
I’m sorry, but it’s a fact of life– you have to earn respect. The dictionary’s definition for earn is “to receive something for work done.” The definition of work is “sustained physical or mental effort to overcome obstacles and achieve an objective or result.” Translated, that means to get respect you will have to put forth some effort — sustained or continual effort, even when there are Legos — um I mean “obstacles” in your path.
One time I had to have major surgery. It was complicated by the fact I had a chronic illness and I was just plain worn out. The doctor insisted that I get some major rest. She told me that I was not to get out of my pajamas for three weeks. Why? Because once I got dressed, it was a signal for my friends and family that I was up to working again. Sure enough, the minute I slipped my clothes on, they were all over me. Now you may be reading this story and saying “If that’s the case, I’ll never get dressed again!” Trust me, I was tempted to stay in my pajamas for the rest of my life. But the point I’m trying to make is the way that you dress does send a signal — to your family and yourself.
If you have been neglecting this part of your life and have been frustrated with a general lack of cooperation from your family, could it be that you have been giving them mixed signals?
For more tips to make cleaning, laundry and homemaking easier, check out our How To Organize And Clean Your Home e-books.
This is my favorite article! It’s so true! The days I don’t get dressed until 10am because I get sidetracked with the computer or just don’t feel good are the days that my house is messy, I spend more money, and my kids drive me crazy! The days I get up and get dressed right away are the days I get the most done, feel better and stay on top of my budget.
I enjoyed reading this article. I too like to get up have a cup of coffee and a light breakfast. Then I always make my bed, get washed and dressed for the day and take my dog for a nice long walk. My mother ,who lived to be 89 years old, would get washed and dressed every day even if she was just going to putter around the house doing her morning chores. Getting up and dressed every day is important. It motivates you to tackle on household chores that need to get done. Once all the chores are done you can sit down with a sense of pride at your accomplishments! There is nothing better than an organized home. You will enjoy living there and your family will notice and appreciate your dedication to creating a warm and loving place called “home”.
Being ready for the day really changes the atmosphere in the home. It is easier to feel like you can actually do “something” productive with the day when you look presentable. yes, a bit of makeup and a cute outfit can do wonders !
So true Nay, plus if I get dressed, with make up I always feel like I’m one step ahead for the day instead of always one step behind. I also don’t have to worry if someone decides to pop in unexpected. That was one reason I had to start getting dressed. I never knew when unexpected customers would show up at my door first thing in the morning. It forced me to get in a good habit.
I have been very sick the last couple years.. yes years. I just had surgery two weeks ago. I’m still tired. But I’m going to start doing this getting up and getting dressed. I had to give up make about 10 yrs ago due to alrgies… but! who knows I still have alittle make up left I can try it and see what happens. thanks to both of you. I have been watch both you on youtube. I got hooked while I was sick. Now I won’t be able to watch as much (hopefully) because I will be able to walk again etc. but! I signed up for the newsletter. OH what part of Kansas do you live in? I was born and part raised in Wichita, and my youngest daughter is going to K. State in Manhattan,Ks. for the next 3 1/2 yrs. I’m Live on a small farm North of Seattle.
Hi Hazel, so sorry to hear how sick you have been. I know what a toll it can take on a person. Remember to take things slow when you start doing these things so you don’t wear yourself out and then give up. I live in Wichita and Tawra and Mike lived in Manhattan for a bit then moved to Wichita. I am envious though because I would love to live where you are. I love the Northwest so much and thought I had died and went to heaven when we lived in Idaho but all the grand kids lived in KS at the time so of course I had to move back to KS to be closer to them. :) Be sure to take it slow and you will feel so drained and tired for awhile but just keep doing things slowly.
You know what I’m going to try this for a week, as an experiment. I’m getting tired of the lack of graditude around the house.
I an almost 60 and I have always gotten up, brush my teeth, wash my face, shampoo/conditioner my hair, put on my makeup and fix my hair. Always make my bed with 12 pillows and I feel like I had such a good start. Thanks, Carol
This is so true Carol. If I am dressed bed made and dishes done then it seems I can handle the rest of the day better. Plus I hate getting into an unmade bed. I don’t know why. I guess we all have our little pet peeves.
This is SO true.. I’m a homeschool mom and sometimes it’s hard to get dressed in the morning with all that’s going on. BUT, If I do get dressed. I find that my day goes so much smoother and I feel like more was accomplished. And besides all that if we decided to go out on an unplanned field trip all I have to do is say come on and we are out the door.
Have to admit I struggle with this. I have driven far too many kids to school in my bathrobe. I like to shower, dress, do hair and makeup about noon.
Getting dressed up including the shoes, is a method mentioned by Flylady mentors.
Flylady has also included a morning routine and before bed routine in her website. It is worth to check out
Yes putting on comfortable shoes is important. I think we wrote an article about that once on just putting your shoes on and what a difference that can make. One thing though I want everyone to remember each person is different and they have different circumstances so adapt things according to your needs. I can’t expect a mom with a toddler and newborn to get up and have the same schedule as me who is an empty nester. It would be so easy for me to say you have to do this and this and this and exactly like this because I have no babies which have kept me up all night and woke me up at 5:00 am crying this morning and hasn’t quit yet.
Take anything you read, use what you can and don’t feel guilty or like you have to justify the things you can’t do. Do the best you can at this stage of your life and don’t worry about the rest.
Thank you for this addendum! I have a 4 yr old, a 3 yr old, and an 8 mo old. I’ve been sleeping in the recliner most nights for the past 6 months, because my baby has so much difficulty with congestion and breathing at night, and nap time is the same, because otherwise he wakes up after 5-10 minutes, and is cranky soon after. I’m still in the “only when leaving the house” phase, even for the kids, because I can hardly keep up with the laundry, as it is (much less everything else)!
Oh I remember those days tired mommy- they were pretty rough. I use to feel awful too because all these people told me how to get organized and step by step to keep my house clean, plan perfect menus etc. I sometimes thought there was something wrong with me because there were gals I knew who did seem to have it together. I had a colicky baby, toddler, was sick and a house with no walls or kitchen etc. They on the other hand had lots of help from their mom, easy to manage new houses and babies that slept through the night from birth.
I found out later it wasn’t me. I was doing the best I could in my situation. You will notice if you have read most of my things I try to say – the exception to this or that is moms with babies or those who are sick etc. because you have enough pressure with out being made to believe it is even humanly possible to have it all together in your circumstances.
My advice is to take a deep breath when you can, hang in there and remember this too shall pass. Well it will pass and then they will be teenagers and once again you will be losing sleep waiting for them to get home from that date or having to go tow them home late at night when they are broke down in their car. : )
Shoes are not allowed in the house.
sort of a Canadian thing I have been told.
But almost everyone I know steps into the house and shoes come off.
Saves floors and saves on cleaning.
So dressed for the day just never shoes. Usually for me it is socks or moccasins or in the summer bare feet.
I actually hate covering my feet and I don’t know why but I always preferred bare feet.
I know what you mean. we were raised no shoes. I got to the point as a kid I didn’t have time to put on and take off shoes all the time… and I’m in my last 60’s and I still go bare foot all the time. I also don’t like socks or shoes on. if I have to wear shoes I wear sandles :)
oh me too jill .. i dont like a messy lumpy bed when its time to go to bed .. my bed has to be made first in am too … then it does seem like i cant tackle the day adn things i need to
hehehe .. grandma .. my mom used to make us take off our shoes at the door too .. we had a chair to sit on and a box to put our shoes in ..
and ur so right .. we didnt have to steam clean our carpets near as much as the others in the apts buildings we lived in … we vaccuumed every day (sometimes more than once, esp if we had company) ..
thanks for sharing this and bringing back a childhood (teenage, too) memory .. :D
Love this article, I am a SAHM who provides childcare out of my home. It is so tempting to just stay in sweats all day, every day. But I never really thought too much about the respect aspect of it. I have occasionally made it a point to change and put make up on before my husband comes home from work, and the kids always ask me “where are you going?”:0) I will pull all the tricks to earn a little more respect around here though. Oh, and no shoes in the house for us either, but love my new mocassin slipper I found at Target for $3.oo a few weeks ago!
I may have to check out target to see if I can find some of your moccasin slippers Da Mama. I love wearing moccasins and still have a “real” Indian like pair I got 40 years ago.
The shoes in this article throws some people. Not you necessarily but others so I just wanted to say I don’t wear shoes either. I go barefoot 6 months out of the year and the other 6 I wear a shoe like slipper. In other words a slipper with a sole so it I need to run out quickly with the trash or something I can in my slippers. Tawra does wear shoes each day but is having foot problems now so may have to start going barefoot too.
The main point we were trying to make which I think you understood but some others haven’t is you need to dress for the job at hand, as you would for any job and that doesn’t mean what you wear has to be uncomfortable either. Treat being a stay at home mom as seriously as you would any other job. Stay at home moms get frustrated because the aren’t respected or taken seriously but how can you expect others to take you and your “job” seriously and respect you if you are wearing pj’s or sweats all day.
Now I didn’t mean this for you Da Mama I just happened to think of this as I was answering your post. :) :)
Meagan @ Sunshine and Sippy Cups
I totally agree with your post here!
I had my first baby last year, and was SO overwhelmed and unprepared!! I remember the weeks of pj’s and once a week showering, lol.
But I realized that I was MUCH more productive each day if I just took 15 minutes in the morning to do 5 minute make-up, 5 minute hair, and put on a “real” outfit.
I invested in more stylish at-home clothes, since I’d be staying home with the baby for a year or so. You don’t have to wear sweats to be comfy. And even if you DO wear sweats, you can DEFINITELY upgrade to a cuter pair, with a nice top.
I didn’t want to become that frumpy old mom…. And that’s how I was looking! It doesn’t take much… You don’t have to get all done up each day. But not only will those around you take you more seriously, but YOU will feel a million times better when you look in the mirror!! :)
When i get dressed, ready for the day, I’m just that. I’m ready for that emergency, last minute/forgotten get together. Life can be more spontaneous.
I know I get more things done when I’m dressed. I’m ready for my work day, being a mother, teacher, cook, nurse, housekeeper, etc.
I never really thought of this being an issue but I can surely see it now. In fact, stopping midstream of reading this article I went to get dressed and do my hair. How different I feel. I, too, do not like wearing shoes in the house but have my cute Avon (indoor/outdoor) slippers on. I love them and got them in a few different colors. ;-) Thanks again for a great article.
You are like I was Teresa. I never knew the difference until I started doing it and now it is so hard to go back and not get up and dressed first thing. My whole day seems off when I don’t.
Heather :) :) :)
I think getting dressed for the day really changes your outlook on how the day will go. Really truly. When I was working, I found this to be true..only here, spent more time to dress extra nice, and not just wear the status quo of what was allowed at work. That made a huge difference in my work performance, too. I thought your post was really interesting, because I’m sure it’s something that not a lot people really think too much about. Love and hugs from the ocean shores of California, Heather :)
I like the apron article on Hillbilly Housewife! I think that was my first contact with your site! I printed that out and shared it with others. Now I have aprons for my work in the kitchen. Once they go on, they don’t come off until after dinner.
That was the one thing I wanted after my Grandma died, one of her aprons. It took a few years for one to be found that wasn’t worn out, but I have it now! It’s one of my treasures! Not only because it was hers, but also because it started life as some other article of clothing that she adapted to be what she wanted and how she wanted. I miss my Grandma! I’m going to wear her apron for “When I Grow Up Night” at Awana next week!
I agree completely, and if you can get disciplined enough to get dressed , you are also more likely to stay on schedule so you can plan your meals and eat more healthy. I find that if I do plan ahead, I don’t end up eating fast food. Getting dressed early just starts the whole day off better.
I like others did not think of the difference but I see it now….I will try it. I homeschool my two kids and babysit a 1 year old and have a little ocd to cleaning….I always make my kids and home look good. I need to take better care of myself (I can see the respect aspect of it all….plus being able to pop out of the house a little more confident instead of hiding in the dark corners…lol…..priceless! ) plus my wonderful husband would probably appreciate it…..thanks again! Common sense thinking but never occured to me ;)
Jinna, I know just what you mean about hiding in dark places. Even though I do get dressed, make up etc. each day, one time we were remodeling our house. It was July 104 degrees, no a/c and I had been staining woodwork and painting for a couple of days in this heat. When it was time for lunch I had no bread or anything so I had to run to the store a couple of blocks away real fast. No way was I going to try and clean up because I had to get back to work right away after we ate.
You can’t even imagine how bad I looked. I arrived at the store and here I run into one of the gals from our church – the one who always kept her kids, house and self looking like a fashion magazine. I wanted to find a dark corner and die of embarrassment. She was really nice about it but isn’t it murphy’s law that someone like that is who I run into. : ) : )
So true – my mother was a SAHM and her clothes were the essence of convenience for that mode. She didn’t stay in pajamas, but she wasn’t invested in her appearance either. I remember she really liked “zories” (flip-flops) – bottom line even today’s Crocs are a slipper and you have to know when you’re under-dressing and why.
Years later she followed my lead to pierce her ears, wear makeup (that was also when she went into the workforce).
I still don’t always do my makeup, always put in earrings, and pick from my nicer casual clothes. But your reminder will help me get a little closer to the ideal.
Melanie I haven’t heard them called Zories in a long time but that is what we use to call them too. I still have a hard time calling them flip flops. There was a time when they were called thongs but as we know that has another whole meaning now. And I wonder why I stay in a state of confusion all the time. I thought it was my CFS but it really is the fact that our language keeps changing. : ) : )
hehee .. jill and melanie .. when i was a kid .. we used to call them flipflops or if they were called flippers .. hehee .. :D
So hard to get out of my warm pj’s and robe when it is 10 degrees outside and about 50 inside, before the house heats up in the morning :/ I should turn on the space heater in the bathroom and get dressed in there…
You know, it is true! We wouldnt go to work in pjs would we? But if you feel good about yourself, you mood is improved along with everything else. And if you need to step out for something or the doorbell rings, you are ready!
This is probably my favorite post of yours! It is so, so true. Get dressed and look nice if only for your husband and children. Put on some perfume and make-up and who knows what might happen after the kiddos are in bed :)
Thank for this article — I need to better practice this. It reminds me of the sweet story you share from time to time, “When Queens Ride By”.
I know that is one of my favorite stories Jaylee.
I don’t usually get dressed immediately when I get up, but I am dressed by 8 a.m. or so most days. I noticed years ago that when I started to just get over a flu, or bad cold, if I got up, showered and put on clean clothes and fixed my hair, I always felt so much better, even if I was still too ill or weak to do anything except lay on the couch. This makes me think about cut backs is health care here in Canada, and the situation some older people find themselves in when they go to hospital. Because of the shortage of care givers, elderly or frail people may go more than a week without having someone help them to wash their hair. Family members and volunteers are needed to help out. The patients enjoy this help, and really perk up when they get it.
This is a great article….it’s all about respecting yourself enough to make the effort.
Another thing that wasn’t mentioned: Children learn by example, and if you give them good examples they will most likely follow them. If you want your kids to get dressed and ready for the day, you also must do so!
I agree, it’s self respect and also respecting others. I like the idea that we are making someone else’s environment by the way we look and carry ourselves.
I highly recommend Jennifer Scott’s book Madame Chic, she has wonderful pointers for getting to our best everyday through wardrobe, self-care, and making the most of everyday.
Ever since I was a little girl I never left my bedroom unless I was dressed. A good way to get up and dressed (makeup optional) is to get a good sized dog that needs a walk first thing in the morning when you get up. None of this go out in the backyard to take care of business, a walk around the block. Its amazing how animals can force you to do things: get dressed and get exercise. Has getting up and getting dressed right away changed my life? I don’t see it because this has been a lifelong habit. And it doesn’t necessarily make me as organized with a clean house as I’d like to be!
There are exceptions to every rule and that is usually not what we are talking about. If not getting dressed is a problem with you then the whole idea is to look for something like that that maybe would help you. For example a woman I know always complained her table was piled with stuff. I told her to clean it well then since it was about 4ft from her coffee pot while she was waiting for her coffee each morning to quickly clean the few things that had been put on there the day before. Part of it is just getting up and doing it. The other part is making new habits. That is what can change a life.
Ya know, I would not have believed this until today. Today we had some new friends coming over for plants. I got dressed, went outside to help the friends and when I came back inside I had more energy than I’ve had in awhile. I got a lot done with a minimal amount of pain.
I believe I’m going to have to do this more often. Thanks!
I understand, I too had to recover my family helped with everything. The minute I felt better I was doing too much and it was back to the doctor. I was told stop lifting no vacuuming. I did learn to rest a but work a bit. This gave me energy left to think if taking walks. My manicure, my hair, and ect.
It’s good to remember that we are someone else’s environment….better to be a garden than a dump with our grooming, dress and personal belongings.
I noticed that it’s been some time since anyone posted a comment so although I’m a little late to the party– it’s better late than never. I have been ill for the last several years- many hospitalizations,some surgeries,taking care of my 95yo mother for 15mos, & then my new diagnosis of Myasthenia Gravis (an autoimmune neuromuscular disease which has no cure & limited success with treatment). I used to be the person who hopped out of bed, into the shower, get dressed, open the windows & doors, have breakfast,then make up the bed. I was ready to face the world. I need to work on recapturing some of that momentum. There are some things I’ll never be able to do again- hurrying through anything just makes my muscles feel like jello. But now I tend to get up, take meds, then eat breakfast.I have to rest after I eat, but my 20-30min rest has turned into at least 2hrs. Then,instead of showering & dressing I’m off doing little chores. I feel like a boat adrift with no one pointing the direction. And I think this is the direction. Time my rest period after breakfast & head into the shower ASAP after. Thank you so much for this article-it’s just what I needed!
Yes Valerie it is hard to get the momentum going again when you are dealing with a serious long term illness but sounds like you are on the right track. Even changing one thing can make a big difference sometimes. Take it slow and pace yourself and don’t get discouraged if you fall back once in awhile because you can always try again. It takes a couple of weeks to start a new habit but you can do it. You might try what I did too and that is I would be resting watching TV but then make myself get up and work during the 5 min. commercial. I then would make myself sit back down at the end of the commercials until the next one then would get up, work 5 mins and then sit down again. This helped me to actually get something done but at the same time forced me to sit down and rest and not over do it.