Ten Commandments for Parents – Some Things I’ve Learned About Parenting

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Things I’ve Learned About Parenting – Today’s Quote Of The Day:

Before we have children we often say “When I have kids I won’t do….” We have babysat, taught and been around children and think we are experts. Then we have our own. Boy what a difference. 

You see, when you babysat or taught other people’s children and it seemed so easy there was one major factor missing – the love a parent has for a child. You don’t have emotions for someone else’s child the same way you would your own and those emotions change the everyday simple things you do with a child and your reactions to them in each situation.

If a child you are babysitting gets hurt, you are concerned and go to get him help, but to see your own child bleeding and in pain puts everything into a completely different perspective.

You can easily say “No” to a child that isn’t yours but to have to say, “No” to your child when you know it is something they want so much can be heart breaking.

When you see a child hit by a peer, you will comfort him and say, “We must learn to forgive,” but to see your own child hit and hurt by another will make you feel an anger that you didn’t know you had in you.

Even though you might think you know it all before you actually have children, by baby #2 you realize you not only don’t know anything but wonder if you ever will.

Here’s a cute example of what I am talking about:

A young married psychologist wrote a book and called it Ten Commandments for Parents.

After child number one he renamed it the Ten Suggestions for Parents.

And after baby #4 he named it Ten Possible Hints for Parents.


Note from me – By the time you are a grandparent you know to throw most of it out the window; to just live and learn and pray for the best. Most importantly of all, love them more than you love yourself and make their needs more important than yours and you will do just fine. You may think this is a given and most parents do this but most damage done to children is from parents putting their wants and needs first. Their need to be angry and yell over controlling themselves, their hollering at a child because the parent didn’t want to be embarrassed by them, being angry because the parent has to give up something they want to do in order to deal with their child’s needs etc. 


photo by: xtheowl


  1. Kris says

    When I brought my first child to church in an infant carrier, an older (wise!) woman told me that God gives us children to keep us humble. That truth has been borne out for me more times than I can count!

  2. Kelly says

    One ‘word of wisdom’ shared with me over the years that absolutely rings true is: It all goes way too fast!!! My youngest will be 4 next month, and while I realize this is still young, I don’t have any ‘babies’ anymore…

  3. Bea says

    Love does make everything seem different no matter who the person is that you love. Their pain is your pain and their joy is your joy and that makes all the difference.

  4. Maggie says

    My children are 31 and 35. I still worry about them everyday and am so proud of what they have become. How we raised two such remarkable, responsible children is beyond me. Obviously we did something right. When you are in the throes of parenthood daily, some days are extremely difficult and some are so wonderful that you cannot believe it is the same family. As Kelly says, it goes by so fast. The high school and college years were gone in a heartbeat. My kids are on their own now and my daughter has 2 childen of her own. It has been an experience I would not have wanted to miss. Love them, cherish them and remember, without the problems you cannot appreciate the good times as much.

  5. JAMES R. says

    It matters not whether you be 18 or 80, it is always easiest to be on the outside(before having childers) looking in, and advice is always easiest to give when you have no consequences to worry about.

    in life, we grow too soon old & too late smart.
    ~an old German saying~

  6. Mary Jane says

    Good post as usual. Love your last point, “Love your children more than you love yourself, and make their needs more important than yours….” The key words here are love and need. Love will care enough to do the tough (emotionally) discipline. Need will keep you consistent and faithful in your daily training, as you remember that you are working with God to raise responsible, productive, caring independent adults; not trying to win a popularity contest, or become your kids’ “best friend”.

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