Mom, I'm Bored
I once heard it said about kids in the summer that "it can be the best of times and it can be the worst of times". Boy did they hit the nail on the head. Summer can be either be one long nightmare with you dragging through each day hoping and praying that your children won't kill each other or you won't kill them or it could be a refreshing time of rest and fun until the grind of school starts.
Now I pride myself that I live in the real world. I was never the kind of mom who would sit all day during the summer playing games and doing crafts with her kids. After the first week of having my kids home 24/7 and not even being able to use the bathroom by myself, I too was ready for the funny farm. I have come to the conclusion that there are only a handful of people (they're called "saints") who really fit into the category of the "perfect" mom during the summer and I wasn't one of them.
But after years of practice and being a little (okay a lot) older and wiser I have found a few things that can help you to maybe not only survive but in some cases to start enjoying summer and looking forward to it (okay I know that's pushing it).
Part of what happens when school is out is that the order and routine is gone so reestablish a routine. It will be different than the one you had when everyone was in school but it will give the day some foundation to work from.
Have everyone assigned daily chores and get them done first thing so if something fun crops up later you will be free to do it.
Try to keep meals at regular times.
Do some structured things with the kids. For example since her kids get almost no penmanship in school my daughter has her 3 sit each day for about 15 minutes practicing writing. You can also have a certain time of the day when the family sits down and quietly reads for their quiet time and a time to cool off.
Take naps. There is nothing wrong with everyone (mom included) to take a nap or lay and rest for 30 minutes each day. This goes for older kids and especially if the kids seem to be fussy and whining.
Don't forget that that it is summer and "the living is easy" so even if you have a routine make it relaxed and flexible.
Let the kids sleep in. Now I don't mean until noon or sleeping the day away but just an hour or so later than normal. Teens sometimes tend to need to sleep later for some reason and that's okay up to a point.
Look upon summer as a great time to teach your kids all those life skills they will need to know. Set aside a part of each day to teach them things like how to do basic sewing, home repairs, work in the garden.
Have them spend a part of their week helping those in need like mowing an elderly neighbors yard, if they are older they could do candy striping etc.
Have them start a new hobby for the summer like scrap booking, collecting bugs and butterflies, rock collecting etc.
As many afternoons as you can plan something fun. Go swimming, play in the sprinkler, go on a picnic, go to the park etc.
Except the fact that you just won't have as much "me" time and will have to have more "mom" time and stop fighting it and being resentful. We waste a lot of precious energy when we are fighting against anger, frustration and resentment. Summer happens. Be like the Jamaicans for 3 months and "don't worry be, happy" or at least try to relax.
I once again didn't have as much room as what I would have liked to write everything but for those of you who got my new e book on kids check it out because I have a ton more of ideas in there for you. I hope some of these ideas will give you a start though. Jill
Now I pride myself that I live in the real world. I was never the kind of mom who would sit all day during the summer playing games and doing crafts with her kids. After the first week of having my kids home 24/7 and not even being able to use the bathroom by myself, I too was ready for the funny farm. I have come to the conclusion that there are only a handful of people (they're called "saints") who really fit into the category of the "perfect" mom during the summer and I wasn't one of them.
But after years of practice and being a little (okay a lot) older and wiser I have found a few things that can help you to maybe not only survive but in some cases to start enjoying summer and looking forward to it (okay I know that's pushing it).
Part of what happens when school is out is that the order and routine is gone so reestablish a routine. It will be different than the one you had when everyone was in school but it will give the day some foundation to work from.
Have everyone assigned daily chores and get them done first thing so if something fun crops up later you will be free to do it.
Try to keep meals at regular times.
Do some structured things with the kids. For example since her kids get almost no penmanship in school my daughter has her 3 sit each day for about 15 minutes practicing writing. You can also have a certain time of the day when the family sits down and quietly reads for their quiet time and a time to cool off.
Take naps. There is nothing wrong with everyone (mom included) to take a nap or lay and rest for 30 minutes each day. This goes for older kids and especially if the kids seem to be fussy and whining.
Don't forget that that it is summer and "the living is easy" so even if you have a routine make it relaxed and flexible.
Let the kids sleep in. Now I don't mean until noon or sleeping the day away but just an hour or so later than normal. Teens sometimes tend to need to sleep later for some reason and that's okay up to a point.
Look upon summer as a great time to teach your kids all those life skills they will need to know. Set aside a part of each day to teach them things like how to do basic sewing, home repairs, work in the garden.
Have them spend a part of their week helping those in need like mowing an elderly neighbors yard, if they are older they could do candy striping etc.
Have them start a new hobby for the summer like scrap booking, collecting bugs and butterflies, rock collecting etc.
As many afternoons as you can plan something fun. Go swimming, play in the sprinkler, go on a picnic, go to the park etc.
Except the fact that you just won't have as much "me" time and will have to have more "mom" time and stop fighting it and being resentful. We waste a lot of precious energy when we are fighting against anger, frustration and resentment. Summer happens. Be like the Jamaicans for 3 months and "don't worry be, happy" or at least try to relax.
I once again didn't have as much room as what I would have liked to write everything but for those of you who got my new e book on kids check it out because I have a ton more of ideas in there for you. I hope some of these ideas will give you a start though. Jill
posted by Tawra Jean at 2:09 PM
9 Comments:
Hi Jill! Loved your blog on the 'kid days' which is exactly what summer is. I have SO MANY friends that say with a sigh, 'Oh it's summer, and the kids are home.'
They think I am out of my mind when I say, "Wow! It's summer and the kids are home!' I love it.
I love not having to read school papers and not having to be somewhere everyday at the same time. I love giving a little freedom to a special evening with a fun movie because we don't have homework or an alarm to answer to in the morning. I love POPSICLES made from juice! I love breakfast at 10:00 because we slept in!
I started with my kids 'Paperbacks and Pizza' for the summer. A fancy name for an incentive to READ.
We all read the same book like we are a bookclub, and then meet to discuss the book once a week. And guess what we eat during discussion time? Yep...pizza.
The little ones(who can't read yet) join in too, because I read the book to them. The older kids take their time on their own to complete the book. We have a deadline and make sure we are all ready to discuss on the same date. About a week works fine.
I create questions to stimulate conversation. Each person pulls a question from the bowl. So far, it is bringing a lot of fun.
Some of the neighborhood kids have heard what we are doing, and asked if they could come too. I said yes, but I may have to change it to 'Paperbacks and Popsicles' if the interest grows.
Would love to hear what other families are doing. Kids really are a lot of fun if we mommies are willing to let our hair down sometimes.
Robin (CA)
In response to Robin's comment:
We do the half hour quiet reading every night. Every day from 4-5pm (usually after a bit of a nap...how nice and civilized everyone is after a siesta) we have "learning time". It starts with 10-15 minutes of journaling in cool looking notebooks. There are several pages that haven't been finished in my son's mathbook so he works on that 3 days a week and we do science or art the other 2. Saturdays are strict "no learning work" days just like during the school year. It's the only day my husband gets off every week and we want the time to connect as a family. We've found that this sort of schedule keeps our son's skills sharp for the following school year and he is better able to focus in class unlike some of the other kids who need almost a month to calm down into school routine.
The rest of our summer days are blocked off into fun activites, chore time, kid's choice time, meals, etc. We have a fun and kid friendly chart on the fridge with pictures of the lil man doing all these things so he knows exactly what's coming up next. It works like a dream for our small family!
You are so right about how nice and civilized everyone is after a siesta. My sister in law use to say that there were two main times when kids would fuss and fight and that was when they were tired or hungry. That seems to be so true. Jill
Can I just add a comment about teenagers? I think that when we think of staying home with the kids during the summer, we automatically think of the grade school age. My kids are teenagers. I taught elementary school for fifteen years, so I think I was pretty good at those years. I always imagined that when the kids were "old" I'd be able to relax some. But guess what? It's NOT true! Bigger kids, bigger problems and bigger problems, bigger consequences- think drugs, alcohol, peer pressure, relationships etc. So this summer, I will be spending the summer with my teenagers. I've decided that I want them to know how to order off of a menu that doesn't have hamburgers for a choice. I want them to know what Tiramisu is (even though I don't know how to spell it). I want them to learn to be spontaneous and help someone IN THE MOMENT-push a child on the swing, offer a soda to someone broken down on the highway. I want them to go to local events that we've avoided all these years; plays, art museums, and historical monuments. I want MY house to be the fun house. I want all of my kids' friends to want to be here. I want to create an atmosphere with hospitality and the things teens love that makes them want to be here at our home. So that's my plan for my teenagers. Thanks for the great blog and keep up the work of encouragement. It helped me to clarify my own thoughts. This blog rocks! ~Karen
Karen you are so right. I am forever hearing moms say that as soon as my kids get into high school I'm going back to work and to me that is almost the worst time to do it. I have preached for years not to do that even before I had teens.
My mom never worked until I was in high school and it was one of the most miserable times of my life. I really didn't have any traumas in my teen years didn't do drugs, drink, sex or any of those things and wasn't even tempted. By that time my folks had taught me well right from wrong so I did good in that area. What I hated though was coming home to that closed up empty house. It always seemed so dark, lonely and quiet. I hated having to do my homework, chores and sometimes dinner all by myself with no one to talk too. I had a younger brother but he was gone a lot or else he was busy being "a younger brother" which was a "pain".
Compare that to when my mom didn't work and I would arrive home to a bright sunny house, with my mom to yak at and tell about my day. It even always smelled delicious.
When my kids were teens I took in ironing to help support us. I had a special area where I did this. I keep a couple of comfortable chairs in there and when my kids would come in from school or where ever they would always plop in a chair and talk away. What tickled me was some times their friends would come by when the kids weren't home and they would "plop and talk" too.
Kids or teens really don't need much only lots of love and attention. Jill
These are lovely, common sense yet somehow you make them sound fun, and you have a great sense of humor.
Jill~ That's a good point. When health problems caused me to not be able to work outside the home, one of the things I started doing was purposely bake/make something before the kids got home from school. Whether it was cookies in the oven, bread in the bread maker,or popcorn in the popper, I wanted my kids to walk into a house that was scented with "Mom's home!" Does that make sense? ~Karen
Karen that makes perfect sense. The first strongest sense that babies have is the sense of smell and I think over the years we tend to forget or underestimate it's importance.
When my first grandchild was born I started wearing a certain perfume and have worn the same one. The grandkids are always commenting about how good "Nan" smells and the little girls are forever wanting to use my perfume. Kids love all kinds of things that smell good and they associate so many memories with those smells. Jill
Hi everyone!
we will be going on a vacation 4 1/2 hrs from home 7 of us any suggestions on saving money or gas during this trip? We will be at a fully furnished house and plan on bringing meals pre frozen for dinner. Kids age from 2-17 we will be going from upstate ny to nh. Thanks Mindy
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