For the Love of Money

Living On A Dime Newsletter - For the Love of Money - February 19, 2008

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Good morning!

As we mentioned last week, we are testing newsletter formats for the next several weeks.

This week, we will be publishing the newsletter on the blog. We are also returning to the twice a week format this week.

Thanks to everyone who has sent feedback. We have heard what you like and will be considering that for future newsletters.

As usual check out the blog front page at http://www.livingonadime.com/blog to see what we've been doing.

Today's article is on money and emotions. It's amazing how much our emotions affect how we spend.
Enjoy!
Tawra
http://www.LivingOnADime.com


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For the Love of Money

One of the biggest factors in most of our money problems come from the fact that we deal with our money emotionally. If you don't think money and emotions are tied together, think again. Take a serious look at all the ways your money and emotions are connected.

Here is a list of questions to ask yourself to see if you deal with your money emotionally and if there are things you need to change.

Are you an emotional shopper?

Do you shop when you get upset?

Do you buy more than you should because of what happened to you in your childhood or because there were things you had to do without? Do you think your children "deserve" more?

Do you buy things hoping that these "things" will fill an emptiness or void in your life?

Do you worry yourself sick over money? Do you think about it from the time you get up in the morning until you go to bed and night? Do you have trouble falling asleep because of money problems?

Are you and your spouse and or children always fighting about money?

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Did you know that in over 50% of the divorce cases the #1 reason for the conflict is money? I'm not really surprised at this because so many people are having a love affair with their money. If you think I'm stretching things and that isn't true then think about this. When you are in love, you have some tell-tale signs: The subject of your love is all you think about and you can't get the one you love out of your mind. You can't get enough of them. No matter how much you are with them it is never enough. The thought of being without them is devastating.

Translate that into money: When you love money, money is all you think about. You can't get enough of it and the thought of being without it is devastating. Many of us have got to get a reality check. Our love (or love affair) with money is tearing us and our families apart. We need to stop using money to satisfy our emotional and spiritual needs.

I have used this example before, but I think it bears repeating: I am walking through the desert and dying of thirst. If someone comes up to me and gives me a new pair of shoes or a big screen TV, is that going to take care of my need? Of course not -- I need water. In the same way, if someone's spouse has just died you don't generally say "here's a glass of water." She has an emotional need not a physical need.

As silly as those examples seem, many of us do the same silly things all the time. Consider these real life situations:

* You have a bad day at work so you go buy something.

* Your boyfriend leaves you, so you go shopping.

* You're deep in debt and stressed out, so go so you go on an expensive vacation.

* You think you might have cancer so you go shopping to drown your sorrows.

We respond this way because we have not learned to solve emotional problems with emotional solutions, physical problems with physical solutions and spiritual problems with spiritual solutions.


Practical Solutions:

Become more logical in the way you handle your money. Use it for necessities. Then when your debts are paid you can start using it for some of your "wants", but only in a controlled way, as special gifts to yourself and not to take care of an emotional or spiritual need.

Rethink the ways you choose to deal with things:

* If you have a bad day at work, what could you do instead of
spending money? You could go home and take a hot bath, talk
things over with your spouse or watch a funny movie and forget
about work.

* If your boyfriend leaves you, talk to a friend, go have some
fun with some friends, or even just have a good long cry.

* If you are stressed from debt, use the money to pay towards your
debt instead of going on vacation and use your time off to earn
more money to pay your debt. Your next vacation will feel much
better if you don't have that debt looming over you.

* And if you think you have cancer, go to a doctor and find out.

Whenever you have any problem, especially if it is a problem that keeps
cropping up in the same way over and over, decide whether it is an
emotional, physical or spiritual problem and then find a solution that
is emotional, physical or spiritual.

I hope this will help give you some ideas to start helping you control your finances instead of letting them control you.
Have a great week! Jill


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From A Reader:

Tawra,

I just received my Dining on a Dime cook book and I have never been so
pleased. I have dozens of cook books that I have received as gifts of
the years (I've started cooking at the age of 7) and this one beats
them all. The very day it was delivered I started using it. Even my
sister- who actually set her kitchen on fire while boiling water
(seriously) has been able to use several of these recipes. I have
told everyone I know how great it is and I plan to buy my newly
retired father a copy soon. Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!

-Tiffany